A bride-to-be has caused family drama over her wedding guest list.
The woman went to Reddit marriage forum for advice on the situation. She explained that her mother recently remarried and the family drama began with her decision to exclude her new half-siblings from the wedding guest list.
“Since my mom and her husband have been dating, I’ve met her daughter 2 times (3rd time at the wedding) and her son maybe 4 times,” the bride-to-be wrote. “We’ve never vacationed together, or been on a trip, or had dinner with everyone at their house, or done much as a group.
“I’m getting married in November and I only want people we’re close to at our wedding, or [people] that impact our lives and make us feel cared for and vice versa. I want to look at the people sitting there attending my wedding and see the faces of the people I love and feel really connected to.
The woman’s mother did not react well to this reasoning.
“My mother insists that I invite her husband’s children,” writes the woman. “She says ‘they are now your immediate family’ and that they are ‘your half-brother and half-sister’ and that it would be wrong to exclude them.”
The bride-to-be justified her decision to exclude her new half-siblings because her mother and her new husband were married by the time all of their children were adults, so she feels no pressure to include her half-siblings and sisters around him. . She also mentioned that her fiancé doesn’t invite his immediate cousins to the wedding, so she doesn’t see the point in including his half-siblings.
“I think it’s unfair and unreasonable for [my mother] to pretend that [my stepsiblings] are suddenly my immediate family and that I’m wrong for not wanting to invite them to my wedding, even if they don’t come,” the woman wrote.
Many editors agreed with the woman’s perspective, and some even shared similar guest list drama they experienced.
“I can relate to that. My dad got married in 2018 and his new wife has 3 sons. I don’t really know them and have spent little time with them outside of their wedding and a few vacations,” one user said. commented. “I invite them, but I don’t give them more. I don’t care if they come or not, but I do so out of courtesy.
“It’s YOUR wedding. You should only invite the people you want there,” another said.
Other editors weighed in on both sides of the family drama, but still sympathized with the feelings of the bride-to-be.
“They’re at an age where I would consider them ‘mum’s husband’, not ‘stepfather’, and ‘mum’s husband’s children’, not step-siblings. So I don’t think you need to invite them at all,” another redditor commented. “Especially since you don’t seem to have much of a relationship with them.”
“That said, I see why your mother asks. They are her husband’s children, so obviously they are important to her and she wants to foster a better family relationship. I hope she and her husband will be happily married [for] the rest of her life, so I can see why she wants her children and children to bond. But that’s not your problem. You don’t have to invite them if you don’t want to.
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